Sometimes being outNabout has nothing to do with being in a physical place, but has to do with experiencing something so unique and different, it could only happen in NYC.
A Real New York Moment :
One time... I was on the 4 Train going home. I hate taking the 4 Train. Every time I take the 4 Train, something crazy happens: a fight; a crazy preacher, or there would be a homeless person begging for money but expects you to give him more than a dollar- not just spare change; crazy stuff like that (I guess normal for the subway now that I think of it-I just feel awkward on the 4 Train). This afternoon was no exception.
I was on the train standing near the door when I noticed the cutest Puerto Rican woman sitting across me reading a book. She was like Rosie Perez, cute- but you could tell that she was feisty. She wore a Gay Pride necklace, black string with rainbow hoops on it. This woman wearing her necklace so full of pride brought me such a great feeling.
The guy sitting across from the woman noticed her too. He was a big Spanish guy maybe 6’3” or 6’4” and muscular (Hot!). He was wearing black tech pants, Converse shoes, a T-shirt, and over his head a do-rag. “I see that you are wearing a Gay Pride necklace. Are you a lesbian?” he asked the woman.
The Woman looked up and replied “I am”. She went back to her book.
“Maybe you just need a real man to show you how it’s done” he told her. Some people snickered and he had the attention of the whole train car now. I got scared. He might not bash a gay woman, but he might bash a gay man, so I turned my attention elsewhere and tried to butch it up as much as possible. I tried not to be noticed. I did turn the music down on my Ipod though.
“No thanks” said the woman, “I tried it. I have two kids, a son and a daughter. I’m pretty happy being a lesbian thank you”.
“Do you have a girlfriend right now?” the man asked.
The woman replied, “Yes I have a partner. We live together”. She was annoyed and tried to get back to her book.
“Interesting” said the guy. “Can I ask you a personal question? Do you kiss your partner in front of your kids?” he asked.
“Yes” replied the woman. “Why?”
The man appeared annoyed. “Now I have nothing against gays” he said, “but when you kiss your partner in front of your children that’s just morally wrong, morally wrong. Kids shouldn’t be exposed to that- to your lifestyle”.
“Morally wrong to show another person unconditional love no matter who they are?’ she replied. “I’m not teaching them to be gay; I’m teaching them to love unconditionally that is not wrong at all”.
“No it’s morally wrong! You planning on teaching your son how to stick something this big (he made an O with his fingers) into a hole only this big too?” (He made a smaller O with his fingers implying anal sex). The Lord Didn’t intend for that. Like I said, I don’t have anything against Gays, but when you involve your kids it’s just morally wrong!” People on the train started laughing. You could see the woman getting heated up. She looked like she was about to burst.
Suddenly she stopped. She took a deep breath. She collected herself and then asked the guy “do you think that it’s morally wrong for a man to hit a woman?”
“Yes” he replied, “I think it’s morally wrong for a man to hit a woman”.
“Why?” She asked.
“Because the woman is the weaker sex. A man is bigger and stronger than a woman. A man hitting a woman is morally wrong”.
“Even if the man is being attacked by a woman, like to defend himself?” She asked.
“Yep, even if a woman started it, it would be morally wrong to hit her. He should be stronger in the mind and know how to deal with it”.
“Well then good” she replied, “because right now I’m going to kick your mother fucking face in, and you are not gonna do shit ‘cause for you to do something to me would be Morally Wrong!” The Woman got up and threw her book down. Suddenly, the train came to a stop and the man bolted off the train.The woman picked up her book, turned to everyone and announced “I’m sorry everybody, if I knew I was going to be talking about my personal life, I would have printed programs and handed them out”. The whole train car started clapping and several people came over and hugged the woman. It was nice to see all the support this woman got, and I realized that this was something that could only happen outNabout in New York City. I also realized that this is exactly why I don’t like to take the 4 Train.
For real. Seriously!
7 comments:
that was awesome! only in NY! and she should've beat the shit out of him just b/c he wasn't minding his business
- michelle
good for her! she need to slap the bejeebus out of him!
Felix
"Butch it up," Billy!
Hilarious :)
Hahahahahahha I haven't taken the subway much over the past few years, more now with the volunteering. It can definitely be an ... experience. But your story whoops my "best" subway story's ass. for real.
Billy.... it's so interesting how I read your story and just had an experience during church this past Sunday. Now you know me, I have gone to church since Elementary school. First as a Catholic but since last year I have been attending a Christian church.
It's very interesting to see the differnce in both of them. Catholics are very reserved (maybe because there is mostly old Filipino women in church, all dressed in black like they're attending a Funeral). At the Christian Church, everyone worships like you see on TV, throwing their hands in the air and shouting, "Yes! Thank you Jesus!" or "Amen! That's good!" I don't mind the worshipping at all. At first it freaked me out but since then, I've been accustomed to it. I like the church because of the music and for the most part, don't fall asleep while they are reading the message.
Anyways, getting to the point.... this past weekend, our Pastor brought up this bill that has passed in the House and is now heading to the Senate. It is about civil unions. Now you know how I feel about this issue, I believe you have a right to love a person no matter what race, creed, sexual orientation, and if you want to get married, "Good Luck!"
So here I am in church, and the Pastor says, let us pray. He starts praying about the issue and for God to send the holy spirit to all the senators to hear our plea and hear gods plans etc. etc.
What does Chelle start doing? I start praying myself. I ask God, please understand that this is how I feel. That I don't agree with the Pastor and the church on this issue. I will not support them and if this is God's will he will put it in my head to go and march with the church on Feb 22 at 2pm at the State Capitol. I prayed that if God feels that gay people shouldn't get married, to give me a sign. I listened really hard but didn't hear anything. I took it as a sign that he was ok with my feelings, or that he will strike me dead at a later date and time. Then I started thinking, omg... my kids are hearing this crap! Yes I actually thought crap in the middle of my prayers. I bet you God wanted to give me Chili peppers in my mouth. I started wondering how my kids were feeling about this issue and told myself, if they agreed with the church, they were entitled to their own opinions.
Anyways, after church, my kids and I were in the car. My first question was, "What do you think about Gay marriages" I wanted them to have their own opinion and I didn't want them to feel that they had to agree with me. My son, Justin 12yrs old, turned around and said, "Mom, I was gonna ask you that same question. I kept telling myself to ask how you felt about it. For me, Gay marriages don't bother me at all. It's what they want, and they should have it." Then my daughter, Shelby, 10 yrs, said, "Mom, God wants us to love one another. If they love each other, they should be able to get married just like a man and woman." Then they asked me and I said, "I agree with both of you." I was pretty proud of myself. Yep of myself... I raised 2 really open-minded intellectual kids.
When I got home, I told Frank about the Pastor's prayer, and he said, "See that's why I don't like to go to church! I would've walked out and said something out loud." I wouldn't have stayed there taking that crap. You're too nice.
Now don't get me wrong Billy. I probably would struggle with the fact if my children came home and said, "Mom I'm gay and I'm getting married". Not because I am anti-gay, but because they will have to struggle with ignorant people like that guy on the Subway. I would fear for their lives. And #2, marriage is hard enough as it is, let along being a same sex couple. There are twice as much struggles they will face.
Anyways, I'm totally getting off the subject as usual. During the service, I kept praying that God would give my children an open mind and not listen to the fear that the pastor was spreading. He was saying stuff like, they are going to start teaching these things in schools that it is ok and normal to be gay. When I spoke to my kids about this, I told them, "Why would they bring this up? They don't even talk about a man and a woman being ok in schools why would they talk about gay people? they talk about sex and sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy. They don't pull you on the side and teach kids, "ok, this is how you 69" or "this is how to do a missionary position" or "apply ky gel like this" To me, this type of talk is put out there to make people fearful and it just annoyed me. My kids were confused about the position stuff. I just told them, "I'll explain that in a couple of years".
But y'know... the pastor is not a bad guy or anything. For the most part, he was trying to be sensitive. He did state that everyone should be cordial and if they bring signs to the rally to be of good taste not demeaning. If I do go, I would most likely be on the opposite side of them. That's just how I feel.
Having said this, I won't stop going to church because there are a lot of good things they speak about, far more than the bad. Not everything is perfect. I forgive them for they do not know how ignorant they are being. They are entitled to their opinion but I'd be damned if anyone tries to force it upon me. I hope the bill passes, but highly doubt it would. Couple of years ago 70% of the state did not want this bill. It could be fear and ignorance or it could be that the majority of people in Hawaii don't want it legal here. Who knows?
anyways... I better end this or people will start to think that I'm trying to take over your blog :) talk to you laterz!
chelle
Chelle - I love your comment! I think it embodies exactly why it's important to be exposed to both sides of any issue. The church has made this a religious issue - based on their own teachings. However, if you peel away all the emotional layers and religious layers. It is a human rights issue. I protested against Prop. 8 here in NYC not because I am against any religious views people have against my lifestyle (yes am Gay!). I respect anyone's point of view on this issue, based on what they believe or feel. But again, this is a rights issue. I like the priests, pastors, teachers, lawmakers, sanitation worker, CEO, black, Asian, white, Latinos (you get the point – everyone and anyone) - should have the right to choose who I marry and wish to spend the rest of my life with. Why is it that based on your God or your faith or your views on marriage, or political affiliation I should be denied that right?
It's easy to be emotional and filled with fear and anger when one doesn't fully understand the real issue at hand. A perfect example is the guy in the subway. He never stopped to think that why is it ok for him to hold hands, kiss show affection and chose to be with a woman, and why is it horrid and wrong for a woman to love another woman? They are both doing the same thing – showing love, affection, having the need to feel needed and wanted by another human.
His fear and lack of understanding fills him with rage and creates a very negative situation for all involved. We tend to forget that no matter where we were born or how we were raised or what we believe and or cherish. The one thing we all are is human. As humans we want to love, to be loved and to be accepted - while maintaining our individuality - why is that so hard to understand and accept? But kudos on your open conversation with your kids and your ability to be open minded and sympathetic and have the ability to see things at the level that most of us forget to view most issues in this world...at the human level. Ultimately we are all the same, no matter how hard we fight and hurt each other to make us feel we are not.
"Rosie" was very quick witted with her comeback! I don't know what I would've said or done if I was in her position. Good for her :D
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